UPDATE!

So I totally forgot I even had a blog and now I decided to start it up again (as long as my internet behaves). Last Halloween was amazing even tho the neighborhood sucked ass. Jamie was the Joker and I was Harley Quinn!!!!

Now, that that was a success, I decided to stay in the Batman franchise this year as well. I already got my costume and saving up for Pookle's (Jamie) costume! We are going as Batman and Robin!

And, I already am thinking about next year (I know, crazy, right???) Here is what I think we will be next year!!!! Little red riding hood and the wolf!!!!! Awesome!

The Chronicles of Chaos [book making project]

Harleen Quinzel log

Week 1

I am finally at Arkham! All my hard work and perseverance paid off and now I am assigned to a new patient that was put in here by the very Batman himself! Wow, if only I could meet such an interesting guy—I wonder what goes through his head while he fights crime on these troubled Gotham streets. My new patient is not anything of what I have imagined as a first case study. He is very menacing at first glance, but once he started talking and opening up to me, he seems like a very attractive, but troubled man. I’m not even talking about the scars that he possessed long ago—those seem to be the basis of his self image. He likes to wear clownish makeup to hide them, but it in fact it does the opposite—it highlights them. I was scared when I saw his image on the television while he was wrecking havoc throughout the city, but now as I see him close up, I am no longer afraid.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HARLEEN: Mr. Joker, shall we proceed?

JOKER: You know what I like about you, doll? (pause) You are the closest thing to me. You understand these “people” because you listen. You have a purpose here, but you don’t want it. You are just as caged here as I am, but I can point you in the right direction.

HARLEEN: Mr. Joker, I really don’t know what you mean.
JOKER: If you must call me mister, at least call me “Mr. J”. It’s more catchy—a certain ring to it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harleen Quinzel log

Week 2

This new patient is a strange one to say the least. I can see that he is one being that is all about himself—what’s best for him. He calls himself the “Joker”, aka Mr. J, and has a certain “clown menace” to his profile, consisting of handmade clothing, white and black paint on his face with red paint around his mouth and cheekbones to hide his scars. Do not let the clown makeup fool you—he is very crafty and intelligent and would not hesitant to kill. Even I have trouble disconcerting myself when I cam around him because he can be so charming.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HARLEEN: …

JOKER: Hmm, interesting. Do I make you nervous? Am I clearing up the bat cloud around you and forming one of mine own?

HARLEEN: Please, Mr. J. Let us continue. Now, how has you week been? Have you had any more urges?

JOKER: Well, yes, actually. Now that I think about it. I’ve been a bad, bad boy.

HARLEEN: I’ll have you know that I can get you into a lot of trouble if you don’t cooperate with me.

JOKER: That’s why I like you, Harley. You got a little fight in you. Makes it all the more fun.

HARLEEN: I think I’m done with you today, Mr. Joker. (shuffles papers)

JOKER: (grabs the back of her neck and her pen, holding it inches from her eye) I’m not done with you though. Far from it. Aww, shall we put a smile on that lovely face of yours? (laughs maniacally)

HARLEEN: (kicks groin and pushes away) See you tomorrow, Joker. You might be in a straight jacket if I have anything to do with it.

JOKER: You won’t need it, doll. As long as you come alone.

HARLEEN: Goodbye, Mr. J.

JOKER: Good bye, indeed. Very good bye. Hello tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harleen Quinzel log

Week 3

The Joker aka Mr. J is warming up to me, I think. He even made a funny little joke about my name and gave me a nickname. We had a little run in, but I am confident that won’t happen again. Scared me half to death he did, and all for a laugh. Always for a laugh. I think he was just testing the waters to see how I would react to his violence. I hope I did not disappoint. He enjoys flattering me for some odd reason, but it is easy to fall under his spell. He would probably be a hot catch if he wasn’t so crazy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JOKER: Now if I may, instead of trying to figure me out, why don’t we talk about you?

HARLEEN: Ok, what do you want to know?

JOKER: Well, I’m glad we are at such a comfortable level. You have beautiful legs, by the way. Your boyfriend/husband must be tickled.

HARLEEN: I have neither. I find that men can be in the way and challenging at times. Are you trying to flirt with me, Mr. J?

JOKER: In my own little sick way, yes. Now I know at least you have no significant other. That’s why you’re always here—with me!

HARLEEN: I’m interning so I need all the extra fieldwork I can get. Luckily, staff is short handed so they need me.

JOKER: Yes, they do. Listening to the crazies babble about their pink elephants and how Lucifer is coming to get them soon. You know, I bet I could do what you do any day. I could. Knowing crazies is kinda my specialty. But you know what they’d say--‘You’re a crazy yerself!’ You are thinking exactly like them right now, aren’t you?

HARLEEN: No, I’m not. I’m open-minded, but I have yet to get to know you. We haven’t had enough time to sort out what you are thinking, feeling, all that good stuff. Maybe you could be in this chair, but we won’t know until we get you thinking more clearly.

JOKER: I am thinking clearly. It’s you who’s fucked up in the brain—this entire facility loves to keep their crazies in line. They may be caged, but I’ll release them. All in good time though. I’m very patient. Gotham has yet to get rid of me. (lays hand on top of hers) I’ll get you out too. I hate to see a winged dove so caged.

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Harleen Quinzel log

Week 4

This week was a complete role reversal; I, the patient and he, the intern. What an interesting turn of events this has become. He found more intriguing ways to flirt, all the while getting information out of me that would probably not been said under normal interrogation. He is so smart—it almost makes me envious of him. What would it be like to be alongside him during all those heists and crime sprees he plans out? It is amazing to think about, which I must confess, I have been doing quite a bit during my time away from him. Should I be worried—is he affecting me more than I should be letting? He is such an interesting subject; I can’t help but to admire him in some ways. He is so endearing towards me; it’s like I am part of his life in his eyes. I am enamored by the way he thinks, the way he holds himself, his very presence. Why is he here when I think he could be doing so much better out there? I must adhere to the hospital’s rules, but is it so terrible for me to believe that he can be freed? Maybe not today, but in the near future?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HARLEEN: They’ll put you in a straight jacket for sure! They’ll stop you!

JOKER: Will you? I will share intimate details with you, but you mustn’t tell. They are counting on you, but you won’t tell. I can see it in your eyes, Harley. You want to see me in action—you want to taste the freedom only I can give you. I know you can become like me, a freak, if you only let me help. Batman will not be able to stop us. He can barely stop me and with Gotham hunting him down, we will be invincible!

HARLEEN: You don’t know what you’re saying. You’ll get caught as soon as you try to escape.

JOKER: Not with you at my side, doll. Stick with me and we’ll go places, I promise you. I know you want to—your eyes give you away.

HARLEEN: I cannot let you do this. I won’t.

JOKER: Now, now. Be a good little psychiatrist. I need you. (grabs her wrist and squeezes tightly) Aren’t you enamored with my mystery? Why won’t you just give in?! Shh, shh, I’m not going to kill you, Harley. I like you. Don’t you see that? I’m going to take my hands away and you are going to calmly sit back down like nothing happened or I will slit your fucking throat right here. I am very creative. Will you behave?

HARLEEN: (nods nervously)

JOKER: You think you can just waltz in here with your new little degree and solve all of Arkham’s problems? I could have easily snapped your neck there, but would it solve anything? No. I told you that I liked you and meant it so why would I do a stupid thing like that? What a waste that would be, wouldn’t it? Wouldn’t it?! ANSWER ME!!!

HARLEEN: Yes…it would…

JOKER: Aww, did I scare you again? It was all a joke, Harley. I couldn’t hurt you.

HARLEEN: But you would pop my eye out with a pen?!

JOKER: You didn’t really think that I would gouge out those beautiful blues, did ya? No way. I install chaos upon this world in order to get what I want. Fear is one hell of a drug, baby. You can do nothing here, Harles, so why don’t you help me get out of this hell? You’d be my ultimate crime wench—my hench wench, if you will. Oh what fun we could have terrorizing Gothamites! Just you and me, and of course, my silly little group of henchmen, parading like we owned Gotham. And we will. Doesn’t that just sound so appealing?

HARLEEN:…

(Photos from:

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.plasticandplush.com/plasticandplush/images/2008/06/06/142.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.plasticandplush.com/plasticandplush/tonner_doll_co/index.html&h=333&w=250&sz=31&hl=en&start=37&sig2=o9unSMDwQYtg8_NezHC95w&usg=__kAd--qFi_v2JWo6uCstdeXcidtw=&tbnid=qG_vH4OYH1zatM:&tbnh=119&tbnw=89&ei=Yxv1SKmhEZyuwQHkwYjSDg&prev=/images%3Fq%3DThe%2BJoker%2Band%2BHarleen%2BQuinzel%26start%3D36%26gbv%3D2%26ndsp%3D18%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN)

Harley (ME!) and my Puddin' (Jamie!) as a Simpsons!!!!

The New and Improved Harley Quinn!!!

Ok, so this is my room mate Amy (everyone say 'Hi, Amy!!!!') and this is my Halloween costume for this year!! (I had to send back the corset cuz obviously it would not fit me). I just need to add the cowel and makeup an mask on my face, the gloves, the tights, and the boots to complete the updated look of Harley. Oh, and the lil pop gun too!!! Hey, if the Joker gets an update, you know Harley needs to as well!!!! (Do you love the pirate skeleton prop in the background? lol)

I know it's early but...

I have decided what I am going to be for Halloween this year!!!! I have had some difficult decisions because I really really really REALLY wanted to be "Jenny Krueger", my own design (pretty much Freddy, but in female form: think red and green tank top and brown mini skirt with Freddy glove and hat), but Jamie, the love of my life, didn't want to be Jason or Michael Myers. We were going to go as movie killers, but he didn't want to do it anymore so I changed my mind. I have decided to be:

HARLEY QUINN!!!

Yes, Jamie wants to be the Joker from The Dark Knight (and so does my brother...lol) so I thought it would be cute if we went together like this. I am not going with the exact outfit; I am making a different costume to bring the character to the present because Heath (R.I.P) did such an awesome job on the Joker. I'm thinking maybe just the cowl and mask, a cool, sexy black and red top (not sure what it will look like yet), a red and black mini skirt (that could be a problem), a red and black high heel shoes, red and black gloves (either full length or wrist) and a Pop gun. I have been looking FOREVER for a pop gun, but I have yet to find and awesome one, but don't worry, kiddies~~~~I'll find one!!!! Anyway, I think Jamie will look sexy as the Joker and I'm going to help paint his face!!! (Bro too) I think this is going to be an awesome Halloween!!!

Edward

The hole is daunting
and yet, intangible.
You left me. Empty.
Not a month went by
that I forgot anything.
Your sweet scent, your
amber eyes, your swift
graceful undertones. Never
will I find a more unimaginable
love. This only proves that I could
not have dreamt you up.
Everlasting torment is what
you left for me. Aching
nightmares and dried up tear
ducts are all I look forward to now.
Someday, I truly believe, you will come
back to me--perhaps when twilight breaks.

7/29/08

Boyfriend

I love the little things that you do.
The silly jokes that are so absurd,
but still make me laugh.
The way you say that I'm cute when
I try to act "ghetto".
The way you hold me ever so tightly
when I feel like my world is crashing
until I stop crying and am whole again.
The way you smile at me everyday
and cannot function without my presence.
The way you pout when things don't go your way.
The way you love me unconditionally
and the way I cry happily because of it.

7/19/08

Hey Bats:

You say that I'm crazy,
but look around you.
Is this not chaos?
People running scared by my face alone.
Could you honestly say that I
am crazy?
The city needs me to balance out--
so you, the winged freak will not get the blame.
I love doing what I do.
I honestly enjoy being limitless.
Don't you?
Laws so not pertain to freaks like us,
but I'm not about to join you.
We are polar opposites when it comes down to it--
you, a pitiful, tortured shell of a man,
and me, a most notorious villain, chalked full of surprises.
The kids root for me.
The people want to be me. Not you.
Being good is so boring--being bad is life's delight.
Maybe you should try it some time.
You might as well--you're just as much as a freak
to the city as I am.
Loosen that silly plastic cape and feel free for once.
I cannot lie--it will change you.

7/19/08

Homocidic Suicide

I have my finger on the trigger--
what are you going to do?
I WANT to do this--I really do.
Why does it seem like you don't even care?
The safety's off and I am feeling high as hell.
Why don't you do something?
Confusion leads to skiddish thoughts and actions--
the number one cause leading to mistakes.
My hand's clutching the gun like it's my only lifeline--
which, I will point out, should be you.
Why do you stand frozen there, a parallel to my heart?
You know you are the only one for me.
Why can't you feel that anymore?
This heart aches for you every moment we are apart.
That sexy swagger of yours just does something to me.
You know it's your fault I feel this way.
I may hold the gun to my head, but ultimately, you're killing me.

7/8/08

Dull Ache

You know that feeling when you think you're breaking up?
That cold, clammy chill creeping to nausea
throughout your veins.
That is what I am feeling right now.
Vomiting inside and probably out as well soon.
How could such a good thing bring mt to this?
Maybe I'm just overreacting like usual,
but this feeling just won't go away.

7/8/08

Nice Day for a White Wedding....

I have been in a wedding funk for the past....I really don't know. I mean, I am ready to get married and have been for a while, but I don't want to get engaged until I am out of school. I don't want to wait though, that's my problem. lol...I really want Jamie to propose and I feel like I keep dropping hints and am trying to stop that. I'm sure he'll do it when the time is right, I'm just being impatient. I am completely happy with him and can't wait to see him with the ring box open, on his knees in front of me. I always thought that the girls were silly when they saw their boyfriends kneeling before them and thought that they were stupid for not knowing what's going to happen next. Duh, bitches, he's popping the question! I guess if they are in shock and can't believe that it is happening, then I guess you would have no idea what was going on, but other than that, you should really know what he is doing. I mean, what else could he be doing....Ok, I'm leaving this one alone...Giggity.....anyway, I'm ready and willing to get married so boyfriend, let's get hitched!!!!

BACKSTREET'S BACK!!!!!!

I am totally excited because on August 8th around 7:30pm, I will see my Boys singing once again! I am so happy! Unfortunately, Kevin won't be on stage, but the rest of the Boys will! Rosemary and her mom (I think) will be in row x toward the right side of the stage and Amy and I will be row p center stage!!!! Yay!!!! I am so excited, if you couldn't tell!!!!! KTBSPA, BABY!!!!!!!!!

Suffocation

Suffocation

The intoxication fills my mouth to the brim
until I cannot feel anymore, but I feel
just right, almost fine. Gotta loosen up when
you can, right? Too much, too fast, for too
long can cause great suffering and you and I
both know we don't want that. Well, I probably
shouldn't speak for you, but I know that you will
always let me. No matter what. It's like you're my
other half--I should say "better" half like everyone
else does, but I would be lying. You are like a
drug to me--shake me up, baby, I don't want to
lose that cool, sweet buzz. I long for that amazing
euphoria--give it to me straight--no rocks, just
feeling. Pure, true feeling. Can't get any better
than that daddy-o. Make me forget all my troubles,
my thoughts, my life. I don't even care if you
make me do stupid shit--just make me do something
to make you smile. I long for those pearly whites
gleaming at me like a beacon from God Himself.
Or a lighthouse. Whatever--your choice always. I'd do
just about anything to hear you laugh, to taste that
luscious throaty grumble of glee for myself and
myself only. If you share it with anyone, I will kill you. Do not
test me on that. For as much as you kill me with your
presence, I kill you so much more.
Makes it so hard to breathe sometimes.

The Joke's On You

The Joke's On You

Sitting here, cold block cell,
tattered clothing, smirk
plastered across my face.
I know what I do. Always.
I enjoy killing--makes me
feel. Alive. Do you know the
feeling? I could show you if you'd
like. Could you really handle
it? Could you really handle
me? Do not underestimate.
For the smile on my face could
turn on you at any moment.
By my hands, alone, you could die.
And I always go by the old saying:
A Killing
a day
keeps the
Slaughter away.

These Chicks Don't Even Know The Name Of My Band...

So my life has been crazy to say the least, I guess. I am thinking about moving out earlier than expected---around June 25th or so (between Spring and Summer classes!), but I'm not sure on how Miranda is going to take it. I mean, I don't really live at my apartment anymore (I'm so sorry, lil Alex!) and I barely see her as it is even though we live together, but we are like night and day and my life now revolves around my one true love, Jamiers. I know it's bad wanting to be with your boyfriend all the time, but I love sleeping next to him and I love waking up and receiving a soft kiss upon my cheek. I have to tell her soon though. I hope she takes it well. The guilt that is weighing heavy upon my shoulders is getting bigger and bigger as the day we stop living together gets closer and closer. I loved living with her, though the good and bad times, but I just need something new and refreshing to jump start my new life with Jamie. Can you believe that he's already asking when we are going to get married? I mean, June 7th will be only 4 months and he keeps asking, even if it is in a joking matter, it's waaaayyyy too soon. I love him pieces and can see myself getting married to him and having children, but let me stop and breathe a while, man. And I thought I was being a bit pushy and forward in my last relationship, shit. God, I love him. Anyway, I'm still in Spring semester and the online class is actually going quite good. I have computer anxiety so when I'm on one doing homework (that's the only time I get the anxiety of course...lol....I can have fun on my comp!!) My other classes are going good as well. I think I aced my astronomy 204 quiz today. Man, that class is easy now that I have half the work done for me already. lol I'm kinda glad I dropped the class when I took it with Aaron. We weren't doing so hot then. Oh well, it'll boost my grade point higher. I cannot wait to get out of school! NO MORE DEBT!!! I am sick and tired of asking Jamiers for money. I feel bad. I will pay him back someday, I swear it. I can't wait to move in with Amyers!!! That will be fun and I can do what I want when I want. Jamie is going to live with us and we are going to party!!! Alex will be with me always and we will be happy! I cannot wait!!!